Bastards

I wish people would just say what they mean, I find out every day new stuff about things and hwat people realy ment insted of what they said. And it always end up the same way, it hurts me. Couse either they realy didnt like me while they were nice ore they ment no when they said yes. And it goes on fore ever, I ask if they wanna do something and they said yes and we did it and I thought it was fun. Then after I hear from a freind of a freind that they hatet it and thought I were a freak. I guess I must be a freak since everybody ceep caling me one. Sigh, it makes me think about becoming a hermit. I hate fucking lying people, say what you mean god damn it. Every time it gets me down and I get depressed and wanna cry. But I can't couse then my parents get overly protective and starts worrying about my suicidal side again. It's gone for ever but it I question my reason for living every time and ask if anybody would realy miss me. The answer I get in my head is always no and then the depresion is back. Therfore I say you lying bastards.

Never say never

You can read a lot of interesting things on the web, though many are false. But if you just know where to look you can get to know the world in another way. Like today I have learned vhat a Mangust is ( a sort of rat), that Ratatouille is beeing realesed in September and that J.K. Rowling has said "Never say never" to writing a new Harry Potter book. So I will strongly recommend everyone to sign this petition.

Sleepless in........ eh Bodø

My parents managed to get the flue after a trip they just had and of course I had to get it too, sigh. Getting sick is getting kind of boring at this point, I have bin sick every other week since April now. So yeah, tired of it. And of course it also means I'm sleepless and bored at nighttime. Maybe I should find a new chat program ore start rearranging my sock draw ore something. Well, if anybody feel like talking around 3 am you know where to find me.

How to let you're play list decide who you are

1. Put your music player on shuffle.
2. Press forward for each question.
3. Use the song title as the answer to the question even if it doesn't make sense.

NO CHEATING!

How are you feeling today?
Solsbury Hill

How do your friends see you?
Don't cry for me Argentina

Will you get married?
In Bloom

What is your best friend's theme song?
Freinds will be freinds will be freinds

What is the story of your life?
Flinch

What was high school like?
Det e derfor eg synge

How can you get ahead in life?
Drive of death

What is the best thing about your friends?
I'm a believer

What is tonight going to be like?
Morning Breaks

What is in store for the reminder of this weekend?
Juliet's requiem

What song describes you?
April Lady

To describe your grandparents?
Wake Up

How is your life going?
Smiley Faces

What song will they play at your funeral?
I can't get next to you

How does the world see you?
Lounge Act

Will you have a happy life?
Unfinished Sweet

What do your friends really think of you?
One

Do people secretly lust after you?
You belong to me

How can you make yourself happy?
Where heroes go to die

What should you do with your life
Susan's House

Will you ever have children?
Emily


Ok, this was weird. Aldo I liked some off the answers.

Update, hopes and Paris

Time for a little update. I've started working again in the same place as before, I've had my first few sessions with my psychologist, cuddled a whole lot with my cat and painted a bit. So life's sort off normal up here, if you rule out the fact that it's 22:15 and it's light out side and 7 degrees Celsius. The light thing is sort of normal though (being above the polar circle and all) but it's colder than usual this time off year. Still pretty normal, boringly normal in fact. The only thing that is not boring or normal at the time being is the planning I'm doing for our trip in September, I'm looking so forward to it I almost can't wait. We are gonna stay in Paris for a couple off days, take in the major attractions and then move on to Disneyland Paris and stay there for a few days. I'm probably gonna work up my expectations so much that I'll be disappointed but I can't really help it. Just looking so forward to it, and can you realy blame me. 10 days on holiday with my best friends. Realizing my dream of going to Disneyland and stay there AND going back to the glories city that Paris are. Sigh, I can't wait.

Marble Cake?

You Are a Marble Cake

Eclectic, inventive, and peaceful. You are never willing to accept what's "normal." You live to push the envelope. You find it hard to make up your mind. You prefer to have everything you want, right away!

What Kind of Cake Are You?

Whoopdedoo me

So it's my birthday to day, and I'm back north. Sigh, this year I actually thought it would be different, friends instead off relatives to celebrate with. Yes I'm freaking gloomy and shit but I have the right to when I have to go to my cousins stupid pree confirmation thingy on my birthday and most people don't even remember that it IS my birthday. I would settle for a congrats and a hug you know. I miss my friends but at least they are coming to see me in a months time and I'm also planning a trip to Paris in September for all off us so I have that to look forward to. It's gonna be great, walking around looking at famous places and relaxing on a holiday. What could be better than a holiday with you're best mates. Right know only a regular sleeping pattern and maybe 10 million bucks. Though my ultimate wish would be to not have ADHD and Asperger syndrome, life would kinda be easier without it. But there I'm right back to gloomy again so I'm just gonna stop here and go to bed, to toss around for a few hours and then make breakfast. Freaking ADHD bleech, no Silje I have not become a vampire.

A wii Sunday

My blogging has come to a hold and almost stop in the last couple of months, mainly because I have been sick and still sort of is but also because there have been nothing to blog about. My days have mainly been about sleeping, eating and watching TV/playing Sim's. This again because of the sickness. So today was a welcome and lovely change in my "program". Went in to Oslo to meet my sis and some of her friends. Some of which I'm very close to and some I have never met before. So also nice to finally have some faces to go with names and blogs, cause yes I have the tendency to read blogs my sis have links to on her site and so on. That's kinda the point of blogs in my mind, people you don't necessarily know reading them. Anyway we played wii and it was actually more fun than I thought it would be so thinking about saving up for one now. Just have to buy all the other stuff on my list first, like new shoes and a present to my cousin. Money come in and go out quickly thees days, going home on Wednesday though so it will probably be easier to save some money to rainy days then. Instead like things are now when the rainy day come and the money is gone. Life down here are complicated but it do have it's perks. Just hoping it will stop snowing soon so I don't have to go out and make a snow angel, the only sort of angel left in my system.

It's time for a new post

So I turn to a new funny test. Liked the outcome of this one tough.

Your Candy Heart Says "Get Real"

You're a bit of a cynic when it comes to love. You don't lose your head, and hardly anyone penetrates your heart. Your ideal Valentine's Day date: is all about the person you're seeing (with no mentions of v-day!) Your flirting style: honest and even slightly sarcastic What turns you off: romantic expectations and "greeting card" holidays Why you're hot: you don't just play hard to get - you are hard to get

What Does Your Candy Heart Say?

Sunday sigh

Sunday again, and I miss you. Just had to tell somebody course I cant tell you. I slept for 18 hours yesterday and now I'm tired again, yup still sick. Going on 4 weeks i think, and the doctors still haven't got an answer. Sigh, I hate this. Only way to deal is tv and the sims. My room mates had me watch Quentin Tarantinos Hostel yesterday and it was so grouse, so good but so grouse. Aren't you proud of me now Ida? Probably gonna see Advent children later, Siljes pushing for it. Have to give in some time so, but now I'm going to play some more. My characters just had twins, what a stress.

Wishful wednesday

Sicknes suck, again

So now I'm here, living down south with my friends and somehow I managed to get sick after just two day's down here. But the really annoying part is that I'm still sick, two and a half weeks later. I have a fever and my throat is soar. It's really, really annoying. So my days basically is filled with sleep and tv. Not that furfilling but all I can manage to do really. But I wish I could do moore. Sigh, when I get better...

Monday weirdnes

How is it possible for one person to be so completely different from one second to the other? Today I have acted so weird I'm even picking up on it myself. So to everybody out there that have been talking to me today ore are going to talk to me in the next few days I am so sorry. Please bare with me and I promise I will be back to normal (you know what I mean) when all this moving business is over, I hope.

Sunday sadnes

My key is lonely...

It's just hanging there all alone on it's chain, missing the two buds he use to have. They have known each other for almost a year know and he thinks I'm selfish and mean for riping them apart. I think I maybe have to find a key to keep him company, but I don't know witch one that should be. I feel sorry for him, and it hurts looking at him all alone on his chain. But I had to do it, it had to end. And I know I need the time that is coming up know to relax and take a breath.

The end of and era... sort of

So I have my last day at work tomorrow and this is the first place ever I have worked at that I'm actually sad to leave. I love my job, I love the responsibility and learning something new every day. I love working with science and I especially love working with all the nice people there. But thats it for know, can't work there forever without a real employment so now is the time to move on. At least for a while, have a summer job there in a couple of months so looking forward to that. And hopefully I can start schooling in August and get a internship there when I'm done. My boss has actually promised me one already and the schooling takes two year's, so guess I did something right. Kinda sad, kinda nervous, kinda happy and kinda scared. But a vacation sounds good and now I can get ready to move.

A great quote

This might be one of the funniest and wisest men ever. I love his books.

"I meant," said Ipslore bitterly, "what is there in this world that truly makes living worthwhile?"
Death thought about it.
"Cats," he said eventually. "Cats are nice."

Terry Pratchett, Sourcery

For more good and funny quotes by Terry Pratchett go here. I strongly recommend it.

Just another manic monday..

Had an appointment whit my work counselor today and still can't figure out what she said. which means I'm even more terrified of moving now then I were a week ago, and I didn't think it was possible. I actually thought at one point it couldn't get worse than this but guess what, it did. My heart have been raising all day and I feel constantly sick and dizzy. If it weren't for the fact that its impossible I would take a pregnancy test. But I haven't backed out yet, still planning on moving. Don't know when ore where but I'm moving and that's that. People who know me know that if I have my heart set on something it's impossible to change my mind. And in this case I think that is in my favor. Just need to figure out some stuff and then brave new world, here I come.

Warning, emo kid coming you're way

So I'm trying to move, and yeah trying is the right word cause I'm not getting anywhere. My current job is ending in about a week and a half and in my mind I'm supposed to move right after that, but nothing is happening. I don't have a place to live ore bought a ticket, and I certainly haven't packed anything. I don't think my parents think I'm really moving, I'm not sure if I think I am. But I really want to. Just wish I knew if the others want to live with me, I know you said you want to but I don't know if I believe you. God I'm such a emo kid. Probably just need to buy a ticket and pack my bags and get down there. Grind my teeth and smile. I wish I had appreciated childhood more cause this is freaking difficult, ore I wish I had a childhood I could have appreciated. I keep thinking what is the worst that could happen, but can't come up with any answers. My mind is also going back to it's old ways instead of going forwards and I hate it, but have totally lost control over it. I'm just a visitor in my own body. Adulthood here I come.... hopefully.

The problem...

The only problem with having a blog your family and friends know about is that when your life is shitty and your heart is breaking you can't write about it and scream it out cause then everybody gets concerned and you feel guilty. Sigh, I feel like crying but I can't and I can't wait until I can, cause that means I'm getting better.